第一百八十八章三界神仙集体耍猴(1 / 1)

【709岁,取经队伍来到了碧波潭。地球人都知道碧波潭其实分为两个版本,原著版本的九头虫就是个吃软饭的小白脸,乃是碧波潭万圣龙王招的上门女婿,只会在万圣公主面前伏低做小,猪八戒随手一钉耙就能打爆一颗脑袋,而高配版本的九头虫则是上古妖圣九婴的儿子,论实力一挑三都能把孙悟空猪八戒沙悟净打的抱头鼠窜,论地位直接抢走了小白龙的未婚妻万圣公主而让西海龙宫敢怒不敢言。你因为孙悟空冒充牛魔王骗取铁扇公主的伦理大戏,希望见到高配版本的小白龙九头虫万圣公主的三角恋情,遗憾的是你遇到的竟然是原著版本。九头虫盗取了祭赛国的舍利子,万圣公主盗取了王母娘娘的九叶灵芝温养舍利子,简直就是一对胆大包天的夫妻大盗,按照西游量劫的剧情应该是一家人整整齐齐魂归地府,但你觉得孩子是无辜的,看在九头虫万圣公主的孩子的份上,最终勉为其难饶了碧波潭全家老小的性命,代价是往后余生禁止走出碧波潭半步!】

【710岁,取经队伍来到了小雷音寺,孙悟空看到小雷音寺就知道不对劲,一只两只实力强大的妖怪不知天高地厚冒充佛陀菩萨是可以理解的,但千只万只实力强大的妖怪不知天高地厚冒充佛陀菩萨就显得太不正常了,孙悟空不用想都知道这是大雷音寺无数佛陀菩萨想要耍猴,于是本着死道友不死贫道的想法,先怂恿猪八戒跑到小雷音寺挨打,再诱导沙和尚跑到小雷音寺挨揍,接着直接跑到西天灵山大雷音寺告状,这让无数佛陀菩萨非常失望。无数佛陀菩萨提醒你,孙悟空就是心猿,需要降服心猿,不能让孙悟空过得太舒服了,三界神仙想要看精彩纷呈的大戏,而不是无聊的走过场。一边是孙悟空,一边是满天神佛,如何取舍简直一目了然,于是你暗中对着孙悟空说了一声抱歉!】

【711岁,不谈恋爱的孙悟空不是合格的孙悟空,你借鉴前世记忆里的紫霞仙子,把你的想法告诉了观音菩萨,然后无数佛陀菩萨全都跳出来,说什么孙悟空野性难驯凶性难改,唯有经历姻缘才能懂得什么是私情什么是博爱,而这种经历孽缘大彻大悟的套路,无数佛陀菩萨表示这是佛门的本职工作,鉴于你是孙悟空的师兄,你可能会于心不忍,为了防止你一时心软坏了大事,所以就请你去灵山大雷音寺聆听如来佛祖开坛讲经了!】

【712岁,无数佛陀菩萨商量着改动了西游量劫的剧本,毗蓝婆菩萨让蜈蚣精率先出场,蜈蚣精利用百目魔眼,刺瞎了孙悟空的火眼金睛,然后利用药师佛赐下的毒丹,让孙悟空猪八戒沙和尚全都封印了实力,由于蜈蚣精忽略了小白龙,所以小白龙帮助孙悟空逃走了,孙悟空慌不择路之下,稀里糊涂跑到了近在咫尺的盘丝洞,从头到尾都合情合理,从逻辑上来说完全没有任何破绽。月老不允许三界神仙质疑姻缘红绳的威力,于是把孙悟空与蜘蛛精小七缠了三千遍,女娲娘娘表示孙悟空是补天神石,这种事情不能袖手旁观,于是用极品先天灵宝红绣球,把孙悟空与蜘蛛精小七砸了八百下,天庭无数神仙表示孙悟空大闹天宫的时候,与孙悟空结下了因果,这是需要清算的,于是一个接一个的暗中下手,原本只是想要教训一下孙悟空,但现在变成了三界神仙的集体狂欢!】

【713岁,蜘蛛精小七,显然无法抵挡无数神仙的暗中下手,于是看到孙悟空的那一瞬间,立刻就情不自禁生出了怜悯之心,把中毒眼瞎的孙悟空带回盘丝洞治疗。孙悟空惨遭封印,所以受伤流血是非常合理的,由于孙悟空曾经吃了无数蟠桃仙丹,所以血液散发着恐怖的药效,这也是合情合理的,盘丝洞其他蜘蛛精,想要天天喝孙悟空的血,这也是合情合理的,蜘蛛精小七于心不忍,暗中把孙悟空转移到了安全的地方,这也是合情合理的,盘丝洞其他蜘蛛精,给蜘蛛精小七喂了三日丧命散,逼迫蜘蛛精小七交出孙悟空,这也是合情合理的,蜘蛛精小七宁愿牺牲性命也不愿意交出孙悟空,临死之前躺在孙悟空的怀里,说起从小听说齐天大圣的故事,内心对于齐天大圣大闹天宫的英勇事迹充满崇拜,能够死在孙悟空面前此生无憾,这也是合情合理的,美女爱英雄的套路,就这么完美呈现了!】

【714岁,死掉的蜘蛛精小七,才是完美的蜘蛛精小七,才能在孙悟空的心中,留下永远也没有瑕疵的印象,因此无数佛陀菩萨的初始剧本,蜘蛛精小七应该死掉的,但无数心软的神仙表示看不下去了,于是孙悟空突然福至心灵,割破手腕给蜘蛛精小七喂血,蜘蛛精小七成功的活了下来。两个因为中毒封印实力的患难情侣,相互搀扶着逃出了盘丝洞的范围,跌跌撞撞的来到了孔雀山!】

【715岁,孔雀山距离狮驼岭只有百里之遥,虽然有着孔雀公主的庇护,但却经常遭到狮驼岭的劫掠。孙悟空拼尽全力保护蜘蛛精小七不受伤害,却无法阻止狮驼岭无数妖怪经常残害百姓,这其实是无数佛陀菩萨对于孙悟空的心性考验。孔雀公主适时地站出来,告诉孙悟空体内的毒,其实是七情六欲之毒,只要放弃七情六欲,就不会受到毒素限制,封印也就不攻自破。孙悟空的面前,出现了两个选择,第一是私情,第二是博爱。如果选择私情,就需要面对无数妖怪残害百姓的心灵拷问,如果选择博爱,就需要放弃心中对蜘蛛精小七的个人感情,孙悟空迟迟无法做出抉择,这就如同至尊宝不想放开紫霞仙子!】

【716岁,你实在是看不下去了,你义正言辞的提出反对,但三界神仙看的兴致昂扬,全都不想虎头蛇尾的结束这一场耍猴大戏,因此全都装作没有注意到你的反对。燃灯古佛看出了你的真实想法,便笑着告诉你稍安勿躁,西方自古以来都是贫瘠的代名词,只要是个生灵,哪怕肢体残缺,或者智商障碍,都会受到接引准提二位圣人的密切关注,稍微出现一点折损,接引准提二位圣人都会心疼得要死,所以什么妖怪残害人类的戏码,其实全都是些障眼法,就是用来考验取经队伍的。如果你对此感兴趣的话,就从撒豆成兵开始研究,若能达到登峰造极的程度,就能一念万物生,你立刻安静了!】

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