第二章 从来没听说过这么离谱的要求(1 / 2)

仅仅失神了一瞬间,小皇帝便恢复了清明,紧接着迫不及待地发问:“你是如何知道此事的,朕自诩是扮地是天衣无缝。”

见眼前这女人不像有立即将他灭口的倾向,李云棠的心思也活泛了起来,轻轻喊了一声:

“皇爷。”

接着他朝下面努了努嘴,用商量的口吻试探到:

“能不能先把火铳移开,这东西杵在要害之处,万一走火……”

小皇帝闻言先是一顿,略作思索后收回了火铳、取下铳体火帽上的击发药,同时白了李云棠一眼,“这火铳并未装填弹丸,就算扣下扳机,也造不成多大伤害。”

李云棠暗暗松了口气,心道这天子还算有些分寸,进而老老实实地答道:

“这其实是奴婢的猜测……”

“猜测?”

这个答案明显不能让皇帝满意,她紧跟着追问,“根据从何而来?”

李云棠没有直接回应,而是伸出食指朝暖阁外一指,同时道出了来龙去脉:

“皇爷先前不是下了圣旨,让奴婢大小解都到殿内皇爷御用的那间净房内,以防在外如厕时人多眼杂,暴露假太监的身份么?

就是在那净房之内新换的抽水马桶上,奴婢发现了蹊跷。”

“什么蹊跷?”小皇帝言语上步步紧逼,丝毫不给李云棠停顿下来的机会。

“皇爷,那马桶为熟铁所制,可马桶底座上层的锈蚀程度却不一样,被马桶坐圈盖着的地方光洁如新,没有马桶坐圈盖着的地方已有轻微锈斑,双方以座圈为界,泾渭分明……”

“你不妨把话说得再明白些!”

听了半天也没听到重点,心中又生不快的小皇帝直接打断了李云棠的话。

被这一催促,李云棠只得心中精简语句,加快语速替皇帝解惑:

“这说明马桶的坐圈长期处于放下的状态,如此才会导致同一地方因是否暴露在外的差异,产生锈蚀程度的差异;皇爷自幼修习泰西之学,其中道理应是不难理解。”

小皇帝没有对李云棠的化学理论提出质疑,但却对这事前后的因果关系不太认同:

“单凭一个马桶坐圈长期处于放下的状态,就能断定朕是女人?”

“当然可以确认!”

理直气壮地回完这一句,李云棠才发觉自己有些不敬,他抬头偷偷望了一眼,见皇帝没有发怒,方才继续解释:

“这其实是皇爷作为女子,太不了解男人了;天下所有男子,只要能站着小解,绝对不会选择坐着。

而小解的频率远大于大解,因此为了方便使用,独居男子的马桶圈上翻必然是常态;而在这种情况下,那马桶底座的锈蚀程度则应当一致。”

还有一句话李云棠憋在心里没说——如今的铁质抽水马桶没有上盖只有坐圈,所以像后世那种盖圈一起合上用以防污的情况也是不存在的。

听到这里,皇帝终于明白了李云棠完整的推理思路,一边摇头一边自语:“居然是在这里出了纰漏……”

沉吟片刻之后,她用颇为无奈的口吻续道:

“这抽水马桶只有巨富极贵之家方有财力使用,放眼整个紫禁城内,怕是只有既是秦藩贵胄、又是男儿的你能看出端倪了。”

说罢,小皇帝在暖阁内来回踱步;时而举头盘算、时而低头沉思,俨然仍在发愁。

李云棠察言观色的功夫颇具火候,几乎瞬间就明白了天子是为如何处置自己而愁,略作思索之后,他张口旁敲侧击了一番:

“若无皇爷施救,奴婢怕是已成孤魂野鬼,哪里还能藏在宫中做个假太监呢?”

这话声音不大,但落到小皇帝耳中,却令其豁然开朗:

她的女人身份暴露,则皇位必失;但同样的,李云棠失去了皇帝的庇护,亦无法在每年的太监大检中蒙混过去,终究还是死路一条,所以他断然没有出卖自己的理由。

冥冥之中,二人的命运已是休戚相关。

想到此处,小皇帝不由地高看了李云棠一眼——他并未在她面前立什么没有用的毒誓,而是轻飘飘几句将把柄阐明、利害述清,倒算得上是颇为机敏。

看到天子面色缓和,李云棠一颗悬着的心也终于落地,他随即趁热打铁、表起了忠心:

“皇爷救命之恩,奴婢虽结草衔环不能相报……”

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