第四十六章 摩登老妈(1 / 2)

西关往事 王阿斗儿 0 字 2021-03-15

“太阳都晒屁股了,你丫怎么还不起床?”老妈朝着赖在床上的摆着“大”字型的我喊道,“你昨晚回来的时候把我高兴坏了,没想到你倒头就睡,看来你把我这当成五星级的快捷酒店了?真是娶了媳妇忘了娘,额,你还没结婚呢?你看隔壁的小张,每次带回来的姑娘都不一样,你这连一个也带不回来啊?!”</p>

“别一大早上就嚷嚷行不行,我已经好久没在我的小窝里睡了。”我摸了摸我脸下柔软的枕头,它从小学一直陪我睡到高中,后来我就去外地上大学了,现在想想吧,是大学上了我。我床头本来还有个毛茸茸的泰迪熊的,后来我十八岁的时候不小心把梦遗撒在了上面,我不得不偷偷地扔掉了它,然后对家人声称是狗叼走了。</p>

“你今天为啥不去上学?”老妈边说边把盛着炒鸡蛋的盘子摆在了我的床头。</p>

“你是不是提前老年痴呆了?我早就不上学了,我毕业好多年了!”</p>

“一个自称是‘小四’的家伙刚才给你打了个电话,我替你接了,不过他操着一口流利的鸟语,我一句都没听懂,也不知道他说的是外国语还是中国某地儿的方言。要不要让他把你的家庭作业带过来?”</p>

“我没有作业,我在事务所上班,我要写的是报告。老妈,别管了我了,你去和街坊邻居斗个地主、搓个麻将不行吗?”我一个鲤鱼打挺起身然后直奔厕所。在西关社区住,我每天都会在早上六点钟准时被小四吵醒,然后给自己冲一碗麦片,再倒四分之一的牛奶,再然后坐在沙发的左边位置上看今天转播的昨天的足球赛,当然只是看个精彩的射门集锦,因为我得在七点的时候出门上班,如果我八点钟还未赶到事务所,我会以扶老婆婆过马路之类的借口向上级解释。</p>

从厕所出来,我就看到了打扮的花枝招展的姐姐和我那因为掉牙而说话漏风的六岁的外甥女。我虽然和我的姐姐DNA结构相同,但性格完全不同,她性格强势,而我是受她欺负的那个。其实,当年我姐怀的是双胞胎,我外甥女出生时,医生费了好大的劲儿也撬不开她攥在手里的死去的那一胎,很遗憾,我本该有两个外甥女的。我姐姐六年以前是个很漂亮的人,现在因为要照顾女儿而憔悴了不少,可见夺走女人的青春年华与美丽容颜的,不是时间,而是从子宫里跳出来的熊孩子们。我那剃着光头的姐夫的上一份工作是发型设计师,现在他是一名渔夫,常年的在海上晒太阳以致于他现在的皮肤晒得那叫一个又黑又亮,仿佛是从非洲过来的部落酋长。</p>

“哎呦,我的小宝贝儿来了啊,舅舅昨天给你买了一堆气球,但是昨晚阳台的风太大,全都给吹走了。”我抱了抱外甥女,不知道是她吃胖了还是我变虚了,我的力气仅能让她的脚离开地面一厘米左右,我不得不把她从空中放了下来。我真怀念她更小的时候,比如我一只手就能拎起她然后她突然拉我一身的婴儿时期。</p>

“舅舅,我听说小丽的舅舅昨天给她了五百块钱。我也想有个这样的舅舅……”外甥女呲着牙说,她的眼睛很雪亮,就像我姐姐当年那样。</p>

我翻了翻口袋,发现了两张一元的纸币,我尴尬地摸了摸她的小脑袋:“昨天回来没带现金,舅舅下次给你好不好?”</p>

“不用等下次,我妈给我买了个手机,你扫我微信支付吧,对,扫这个就行。”她用小手指了指她手机屏幕上的二维码。扫完之后,我望着她蹦蹦跳跳逐渐远去的身影,露出了羡慕不已的神情,要是我小时候也有部手机就好了。</p>

我走出了屋子,外面强烈的阳光透过云彩落下来,将大地晒得发烫。我住在一个四合院内,四合院有三户人家,当然原本有四户的,上个世纪唐山大地震的时候波及到了这里,那间屋子瞬间夷为平地。我发现在四合院中间的那棵大柳树下站着一个女孩,像极了跟我小时候玩捉迷藏的青梅竹马的玩伴——小芳,这么多年了,她面容都没什么明显的变化,当然她的胸部和身高确实是大了不少。我跟她小时候经常在一起玩耍,比如她在她的家里玩,我在我的家里玩。</p>

“嗨,小芳,你还记得我吗?三年级的时候,我偷了你一块橡皮。”我挠了挠后脑勺对我面前的这个女孩说。</p>

“呀,你是那个四眼仔——老王?我怎么会忘了,从我妈给我断奶那天起,我这脑袋就没有忘记过任何事,那天是下毛毛雨的周二,我发现……我妈再也挤不出奶水了,”小芳回忆着往事说,“对了,我现在是个房地产经纪人,我活儿不错的,甚至还掀起了同性恋们前往郊区居住的浪潮。”</p>

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